


like sunshine

by yasi



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:26:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22462552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yasi/pseuds/yasi
Summary: Ben loves nothing more than making Callum smile.
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 12
Kudos: 119





	like sunshine

Ben loves nothing more than making Callum smile. His face just glows, like the sun on a clear cloudless day, radiating warmth. Every day Callum doesn’t smile is a wasted day, so Ben takes it upon himself to make Callum smile at least once a day. He takes pride in it. He particularly loves those days when he’s the only one who can make Callum smile.

~*~*~

“Oi, don’t put your paperwork on my pile. Or else I’ll send it out and my punters will wonder about weird extra charges like embalming costs. Then I will have to explain to them about my hot boyfriend working at the undertakers,” Ben says, as Callum absentmindedly puts his invoice onto one of Ben’s piles. Callum looks up startled, but then grins brightly when he registers Ben’s words.

Ben looks at him from under his lashes, smiles softly and turns back to his work. His feet tangle with Callum’s under the table. They’re sitting at the dining table, both doing paperwork, Ben for the car lot, Callum for the funeral parlour. It’s all very domestic.

“I know what you’re doing, you know,” Callum says into the quiet of the room after working for a while.

Ben looks up, his eyes questioning. “I thought we were both doing the same thing. Paperwork?”

Callum rolls his eyes. “Don’t play dumb with me, Ben.”

“What am I doing, then, Callum? Enlighten me.” Ben looks at him expectantly.

“I’m talking about your eternal joking. You’re trying to make me laugh and you’re doing that every day. Don’t think I haven’t noticed.” He smiles, blushing slightly.

“Am I now?” Ben can barely contain his own smile.

Callum snorts, shaking his head with a huge grin, his blush deepening furiously.

And Ben’s heart feels like it’s growing in size in his chest just because of that smile. In that moment he loves Callum like he hasn’t loved anyone. Ben’s love is consuming him from the inside, shattering everything and making place for something new, something pure.

This burning need in him is screaming for Callum. So, Ben lunges for him, startling Callum, making him drop his pen. He gets up hastily, pulling Callum with him, leans on his tiptoes and slots his lips over Callum’s.

But instead of calming the storm in Ben, it turns his insides to a hurricane, making his blood rush hotly. He barely notices Callum’s big hands grabbing his face, thumbs softly caressing his cheeks. Always so soft. And Ben just let go.

They kiss, nip and bite for what feels like an eternity.

When they finally come up for air, they stay in each other’s space. Eyes closed, their foreheads touching, breathing heavily. The air around them is hot and heavy.

“I cannot tell you how much I love you. What loving you does to me,” Ben whispers, like it’s a secret meant just for them. “Whatever happens between us, please never doubt my love for you.”

“Will you stop talking like you’re gonna leave me tomorrow.” Callum’s voice is hoarse. And that makes Ben’s insides burn again, he feels feral.

Ben attacks Callum’s mouth all over again, whispering ‘never’ over and over into Callum’s swollen lips. Their frantic kissing leads to wandering hands, pulling clothes, touching flesh. They stumble onto the sofa and forget the world.

~*~*~

It’s a while later, they’re settled on the sofa. Callum is on his back, with Ben lying partly on him, partly on the sofa. Callum’s hand is gently running through Ben’s hair. Ben is content, with his head lying on Callum chest, their legs intertwined. His left hand is doodling random patterns on Callum’s free arm. They’re quiet, enjoying being close to each other.

Callum breaks the silence first.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, o’course. Why d’you ask?” Ben mumbles into Callum’s chest. He’s far too cosy to move his body, let alone his head.

“Because this felt different.” Callum hesitates for a second. “More intense than ever before.”

“Oi, you telling me it hasn’t been earth-shattering with me all the other times? You joking, right?” Ben abruptly looks up at Callum, trying for annoyed and failing miserably. He just smiles up at Callum.

It makes Callum chuckle and shake his head in return.

“You know what I mean, Ben. It’s always intense with you, because it feels right. Like I was born to do it, just like you said.” He pauses for a moment, collecting his thoughts. “But you know this time was different. It felt like something was slotting into place. I don’t know how to explain it.” He stops again. “You know I’m no good with words. Don’t make me try.” He slaps Ben's back lightly.

Ben's smile slips, he sighs, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opens them again, he hopes Callum can see how sincere he is.

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I think this was me letting you in completely.” Ben swallows, takes a deep breath before he continues. “This is what loving you feels like to me, Callum. Before, a small part of me always feared you’d realise what kind of person I am and that you wouldn’t wanna deal with it and that you’d leave me. I think I was trying to protect myself against that pain. That’s why I broke up with you before Christmas. Hurting myself was easier than giving you power over my heart.” He exhales.

“Not that it helped. It was already too late; I was in way too deep. I know that now. And I hurt you in the process, which was the last thing I wanted. But I also know that you love me the way I am. That you see all the pieces of me and still love me, on purpose. And I don’t know what I did to deserve you. But I will do anything I can to be worthy of your love. To keep you by my side. To make you happy. Because I do love you. With all that I am.” Ben can feel himself flushing. He looks away, trying to hide his face from Callum.

They’re both quiet. Ben is afraid he’s said too much. He makes to get up, but Callum stops him with a hand on his back.

“I wish you’d stop being so hard on yourself, Ben.” Callum begins. “You’re more than your bad parts. You’re a great father to Lexi, a good friend to Jay and Lola. A good son to Kathy. Bobby will never say it out loud, but I know he admires you for the way you deal with your past.” Callum pauses.

“There are a lot of good things about you. And yeah, you’re no angel with your dodgy dealings and stolen cars. And what you did to Keanu was no harmless joke. It took me a bit to get my head around it, to understand why you had to do it. I know all that.

“But I also know that I’d rather deal with all this drama with you together than not be with you. With you I feel right, I feel at home. No amount of drama will make me stop loving you. As long as you’re honest with me, I can deal with anything. And we’ll be all right.” He smiles at Ben softly.

“And here I thought I was being soft, when there is you, going all mushy on me.” Ben says, making Callum roll his eyes. He doesn’t give Callum a chance to reply, just leans up for a tender kiss.

They spend the rest of the afternoon on the sofa, in each other’s arms, just talking about everything and nothing.


End file.
